The Goodbye World Gazette

Serving the Departed Since Whenever · « De Mortuis Nil Nisi Absurdum »

Vol. I · No. 61 Late Edition Sunday, October 4, 2026 Circulation: 67 Departed · 716 Condolences

In Memoriam

← All Departures

Yolanda Ogglethorpe

Autocorrected out of existence.

Borna dreary day in 1955, probably
Died2035, rather abruptly
Causetripped headfirst into a cautionary tale
Survived byA rivalry with a vending machine, now permanently unresolved

It is with a confusing blend of grief and relief that we share news of Yolanda Ogglethorpe, aged 80. They will be remembered for their unshakable confidence in bad decisions. They are survived by a collection of participation ribbons from a 5K they didn't finish.

Guestbook — Letters to the Departed

  1. 1. Ursula Y. writes:

    “They were banned from three different bowling alleys, and I never asked why.”

  2. 2. Myrna D. writes:

    “I'm only here because they'd have wanted witnesses.”

  3. 3. Rita L. writes:

    “Signing the guestbook because the group chat asked me to.”

Sign the Guestbook