In Memoriam

Wynifred Jumblesworth

They said "see you later." Bold of them.

Born	a foggy day in 1916, probably
Died	1964, rather abruptly
Cause	was undone by their own "reply all"
Survived by	A very patient dentist who saw them twice a decade

After a spirited, ultimately unsuccessful negotiation with mortality, Wynifred Jumblesworth, aged 48. They had strong, unshakeable opinions about parking lot etiquette. They are survived by a voicemail box nobody has the courage to clear.

Guestbook — Letters to the Departed

1. Wendy C. writes:

“They promised to fix my sink "next weekend" for three years running.”
2. Paula V. writes:

“Their karaoke rendition lives on in several restraining orders. RIP.”
3. Mick T. writes:

“This explains the very strange voicemail they left me last week.”
4. Randy Z. writes:

“I'll always remember the parking lot incident. They know which one.”
5. Toby J. writes:

“They'd want us all to overreact slightly. So we are.”
6. Nancy G. writes:

“The last text they sent me was just three exclamation points. Iconic to the end.”
7. Betty H. writes:

“They said they'd slow down eventually. Bold of them to lie like that.”
8. Flo W. writes:

“They were banned from karaoke night and never once apologized.”
9. Perry M. writes:

“Miss them already, mostly during trivia night.”
10. Earl S. writes:

“I still owe them for that bet. Consider it a wash.”
11. Vinnie Q. writes:

“Condolences aside, does anyone know what happens to their fantasy team now?”
12. Roger G. writes:

“Condolences to the family, and also to their unfinished fantasy draft.”

Wynifred Jumblesworth

Guestbook — Letters to the Departed

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