The Goodbye World Gazette

Serving the Departed Since Whenever · « De Mortuis Nil Nisi Absurdum »

Vol. I · No. 61 Late Edition Sunday, October 4, 2026 Circulation: 67 Departed · 716 Condolences

In Memoriam

← All Departures

Thaddeus Grumblestein

Autocorrected out of existence.

Borna unseasonably cold day in 1969, probably
Died1995, rather abruptly
Causetripped over the finish line of an argument they were losing
Survived byA decades-long feud with a crossword puzzle publisher

In a turn of events that surprised the family more than fate itself, Thaddeus Grumblestein, aged 26. They never once admitted to being wrong, and went out exactly the same way. They are survived by an unreasonably large jar of pennies.

Guestbook — Letters to the Departed

  1. 1. Nelda G. writes:

    “Their group chat presence cannot be replaced. Please do not try.”

  2. 2. Vinnie A. writes:

    “Condolences, but seriously, who's captaining the trivia team now?”

  3. 3. Jolene J. writes:

    “They promised to teach me their secret recipe. Guess it's secret forever.”

  4. 4. Ronnie W. writes:

    “I'll never forget them arguing with a self-checkout machine for ten minutes.”

  5. 5. Andy P. writes:

    “They told the best worst jokes. This one's on them.”

  6. 6. Walt D. writes:

    “They would have wanted us to argue about the will. So. Here we are.”

  7. 7. Jerry E. writes:

    “They said "watch this" right before this happened, allegedly.”

  8. 8. Oscar N. writes:

    “They said "trust me" one too many times, and yet, here we are.”

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